I was very good at drinking water.

I drank out of a quart mason jar. All day my jar would follow me around the house. Sometimes it would sit in the kitchen, sometimes by the computer or at the table and sometimes I would end up with more than one floating around, but I always had water at hand.

Until…

Jane came bursting through the front door. “MOM! A woolly bear peed on my finger!!!” She was half excited and half horrified. I inspected her finger, (having never been peed on by a caterpillar myself) and sure enough there was a tiny drop of liquid on her finger. I wasn’t sure if it was bonafied caterpillar pee but I told her to go wash it off anyway.

Jane walked into the kitchen, looked on the counter and said, “I’ll just dunk it in here” and then, in a motion so smooth it could only have been born of habit, she reached up to dunk her hand into my water glass.

I’ve been slightly dehydrated ever since.