The Future

When your job is a stay at home mom it’s a bit of a conversation stopper. Too many bodily fluids to be glamorous. Too many people do it to be unique. Too many interruptions from the kids to have a conversation about anything anyway.  No matter how important I feel my job is, there are certainly many who don’t actually see it as a “job” at all. And there is no denying that the longer I’m out of the “real” workforce, the more difficult it will become to ever get a “real” job that relates at all to what I once went to school for.

And I’m ok with that.

When I imagine my future, I see visions goats and orchards (and yes I know those are totally incompatible) rather than a 8 -5 work week. But, honestly, I don’t spend much time thinking about it. All my brain power is currently allocated to figuring out what to eat for dinner, how to keep the kids from strangling each other and desperately searching out small chunks of time to nap in.

Little did I know that my eldest does not share my laissez-faire attitude toward my future career. While enjoying a rare evening alone with Ivy, she brought the subject up.

Ivy: “So, what kind of job do you think you are going to do when we all get older and build our own houses.”

Me:” I’m not sure, I might have to wait and see. What do you think?”

Ivy: “Well… you wouldn’t have to get a job. You could just stay home and look at magazines and find things for us to buy in them.”

I wasn’t sure what to make of this. Does she think I need a job? Has Ivy joined the ranks of people who think I’ll be unqualified for anything once the kids were gone and so will be stuck looking at magazines? Does she think I would like to look at magazines all day? Has my child ever met me? And seriously, if I was looking at magazines all day, wouldn’t I be finding things for myself to buy? Unthrilled about this magazine suggestion of hers, I mentioned the possible acquisition of goats. Ivy met my life long wish for goats with her very best six year old version of well-if-you-think-so-but-that’s-actually-a-ridiculous-idea “Okaay…”

Card game over we headed out to get ourselves an ice cream treat. As I pulled out of the driveway, mind still half on my future life, Ivy, still ecstatic to be the only child for the evening, had a new game for us to play.

Ivy: “I know let’s be rock stars!”

Me: “Ok, how do we do that.”

Ivy: “Well, you just have to be really cool.”

Me: “Aren’t we already cool?”

Ivy: “Well… yeah!”

It’s true, I’ve got no blossoming career to look forward to, no dream job that was put on hold while the kids grew up. But at a moment in time where my little girl thinks I’m “really cool” the goats and magazines will have to wait.Ivy

And I’m ok with that.


22 comments on “The Future

  1. James says:

    Regarding your comment that some people don’t see motherhood as a job – you might enjoy this post:

  2. Diane says:

    Lovely picture! Jessie you already are a Rock Star!

  3. Becky says:

    Wow! What a beautiful picture! I agree with Ivy…you are a rock star. I’m so glad you are o.k. with your very important job that you have right now, because it truely is one of the MOST important things you could ever do in your life. Trust me, what you do each and every day is a “real job”. I wish more women would do the same.
    Rock on!! 🙂

  4. I loved the part about reading magazines and buying stuff. It made me laugh loudly, you know, the kind of laugh that makes you snort?! Thank goodness there are still Moms with enough confidence to thrive without the fawning approval of their cubicle confined peers.

  5. I have been in and out of the workforce through the years as my kids grew so I know exactly how you feel. I will never understand why people define others based on what they get paid to do.

    • Jessie says:

      I think it’s because it’s so easy to define based on job. When you start looking beyond that it requires, thought and attention and heaven knows nobody would want to do that when they could mentally file you and move right on…

  6. rarasaur says:

    What a wonderful picture!! 🙂 And, for what it’s worth, I think you’re pretty cool, too.

  7. says:

    Oh this is so wonderful and thank you for sharing the conversation. She’s right and you’re right.

  8. kevinjhurt says:

    I really enjoyed this post. I was a bit of Mr. Mom while I was working on my PhD and let me tell you, anyone who has ever thought raising kids was not a job has never actually tried it. Staying at home with kids is a lot more work than any 8-5 job I ever had so hats off to you. No one cares for a child more than a parent so they are lucky to have mom at home right now. As for the photo of your daughter, that is simply a beautiful image. From the technicals like composition and exposure, to that beautiful expression you captured. I hope that was enlarged and put on the family wall. Best to your future…

  9. Imelda says:

    What a beautiful photo of your daughter, Jessie.
    Your daughter asks hard questions, should I say? 🙂 But surviving the day without too many bruises and bickering and all that stuff is enough challenge for the day. 🙂

  10. gapark says:

    lovely! All morning while I’m at work, my daughter has been sending me cute photos of what her little 13 month-old charmer is doing and sharing the funny things her 5 y/o is saying. I am so envious! She has the best life ever, getting to be home with those little ones all day!

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