Which Sarah?

I’m not the kind of person who is willing to let my kids name animals without my help. If that was the case we’d have a goose named Fluffy, a cat named Sparkle Kitty and a rooster named Roosty.

Actually we do have a rooster named Roosty and he has been a most excellent rooster for many years. Many years, as in almost five years, which in case you are wondering is a lot of years to be using a ridiculous name for a barnyard animal that you call by name far more often than you ever suspected you would.

And this is why I now have veto power when it comes to pet names. Veto power that has prevented the new kitten from being named Sparkle Kitty or Lestia or Falasha or Sarah.

Now Sarah might sound like a fine name compared to the others but that’s because you’ve not heard the follow up question asked in my household every time anyone utters the name Sarah. And it’s not something easy like “Which Sarah?” Oh no, it’s, “Sarah your friend or Sarah Jonas’s mom or Sarah Wren’s mom or Sarah the cat?”

The kitten came to us with the name Sarah but it only took about twelve hours for the name Sarah Cat to be vetoed by the mom who was losing her sanity trying to differentiate between all the Sarahs in her children’s lives.

Sadly, Baroness Sarah McCutiePie Von Stuffington of Sunshine Manor didn’t really work out as her new name because the kids just called her Sarah for short… “Wait… do you mean Sarah your friend or Sarah Jonas’s mom or Sarah Wren’s mom or Sarah the cat?”

After much debate and a brilliant intervention by Sarah (Sarah my friend, not Sarah Jonas’s mom or Sarah Wren’s mom or Sarah the cat) the new kitten has been named Simone.Simone

Otherwise known as:

-“The kitten… umm …what’s her name again?

– “Sarah”

-“Not Sarah… Oh! Simone!”

– “No Sarah!”

-“No! It’s Simone now.”

-“But she was responding to Sarah!” (She is a cat, she wasn’t responding.)

-“Well Sarah, I mean Simone (insert cute kitten activity here) it was so cute!!!.”

-“Sarah the cat or Sarah mom’s friend or Sarah Jonas’s mom or Sarah Wren’s mom?”

It’s going to happen though. The power of the veto is going to hold and the cat is not going to be called Sarah. And my children are going to learn to use context to answer their questions because I don’t care what my fourth grade teacher said, there are all sorts of stupid questions a person can ask. Already in our family of five at least two people call the kitten Simone at all times and can determine which Sarah is being referred to using nothing but the context of conversation at least 90% of the time. The other, shorter, three are getting there – kind of.

But please, please, for the love of Pete, if your name is Simone, though I’m sure you are a fantastic person, don’t introduce yourself to my children!


22 comments on “Which Sarah?

  1. Julie Bender says:

    Great story

  2. bahahaahaaa! hilarious! love it! and wow, you made it snow on your blog. that is talented! 🙂 Happy winter!

    • Jessie says:

      Eh- not so much talent. I just checked the little box that says, yes please, I love snow, please make it snow on my blog for the month of December! Happy Winter to you too!

  3. allangilmour says:

    My two furry friends, Mr Midnight and Sir Winston, are very liberal and although they often wonder how they managed to get their names they´re not really bothered what they are called. Mr Midnight explained to me in great detail that Cats (and other animals for that matter) are not interested in calling one another “names”. They are as they are – namely cats. They told me name invention is something for humans.
    We enjoyed your post and hope you write many more enjoyable pieces.
    Kind regards from the strange “Gilmours Nice Place” blog.

    • Jessie says:

      Mr Midnight and Sir Winston sound like exceptionally intelligent cats! It’s kind of them all to put up with us humans and our silly inventions like names and vacuum cleaners. Thank you for visiting! 🙂

      • allangilmour says:

        We enjoyed dropping by “Behind the willows”!
        Mr Midnight and Sir Winston both say that if we humans didn´t invent so many things then they would have far less to observe and not as much entertainment. Anyway, thank goodness it´s not up to my two furry friends to decide what the human race should do or not do.
        Kind regards from the three of us. 🙂

  4. Jesska says:

    The Naming Of Cats by T. S. Eliot

    The Naming of Cats is a difficult matter,
    It isn’t just one of your holiday games;
    You may think at first I’m as mad as a hatter
    When I tell you, a cat must have THREE DIFFERENT NAMES.
    First of all, there’s the name that the family use daily,
    Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo or James,
    Such as Victor or Jonathan, George or Bill Bailey–
    All of them sensible everyday names.
    There are fancier names if you think they sound sweeter,
    Some for the gentlemen, some for the dames:
    Such as Plato, Admetus, Electra, Demeter–
    But all of them sensible everyday names.
    But I tell you, a cat needs a name that’s particular,
    A name that’s peculiar, and more dignified,
    Else how can he keep up his tail perpendicular,
    Or spread out his whiskers, or cherish his pride?
    Of names of this kind, I can give you a quorum,
    Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo, or Coricopat,
    Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellylorum-
    Names that never belong to more than one cat.
    But above and beyond there’s still one name left over,
    And that is the name that you never will guess;
    The name that no human research can discover–
    But THE CAT HIMSELF KNOWS, and will never confess.
    When you notice a cat in profound meditation,
    The reason, I tell you, is always the same:
    His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation
    Of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name:
    His ineffable effable
    Deep and inscrutable singular Name.

  5. ellenbest24 says:

    Sarah McNultipie von stuffington still seems a good name *sniff* she does look french so Simone will do nicely. Love your write😇

    • Jessie says:

      Thank you. Perhaps she may turn out to be Simone Von Stuffington of Sunshine Palace… one never knows! 🙂 And the main reason Jane agreed to the name was that she was able to be convinced that Simone was a fancy French name and therefore she could learn some french and speak that to her and that would be extra fancy. (Just like in her favorite Fancy Nancy books.) So yup, she’s a french kitten -from Northern Wisconsin… It’s a small world? 😀

  6. 1jaded1 says:

    Love the name Simone. 🙂

  7. junekearns says:

    The kitten will prefer the name Simone, obvs. (More hisses).

  8. Natalie says:

    I am totally in board with helping your kids name the animals, if it wasn’t for a big of adult intervention we would have two gineau pigs named pinky and perky, instead of the far more sensible Colin (RIP now) and Bob.

  9. […] because within the first two hours the kids had already called him Goose 7 gazillion times (revisit the saga of Sarah Cat and wonder why I didn’t learn my lesson) and partly because I like it (and Mom still gets […]

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