I have come to the conclusion that the earwigs invading our house are macho, gambling, earwigs.

Russian Roulette playing earwigs.

The earwigs, (renamed “PINCHERS!” by Clara) climb the stairs and see if their luck will hold.

Scenario One:

Clara sees a “PINCHER!” on the stairs. starts crying and refuses to move up or down the stairs until someone comes to help her. I come to help and attempt to make squishing the bug fun by stomping it with a toy horse, Clara refuses to be entertained or comforted by my actions. Earwig dies, Clara gets over it, life goes on.

Scenario Two:

Clara sees a “PINCHER!” on the stairs, starts crying and refuses to move up or down the stairs until someone comes to help her. I come to help and attempt to make squishing the bug fun by stomping it with a toy horse, Clara is amused. Ivy shows up with shouts of “MOM YOUR HURTING IT!” Well, yes Ivy, you are right. I’m sorry I wasn’t intending to hurt it, I was intending to smash the life from it… let me try again. Earwig dies, Ivy cries, Clara and I leave confused.

Scenario Three:

Clara sees a “PINCHER!” on the stairs, starts crying and refuses to move up or down the stairs until someone comes to help her. Ivy comes to help and smashes the earwig with a toy horse. Earwig dies,  Clara and Ivy are satisfied, I wonder what brought about Ivy’s change of heart.

Scenario Four:

Clara sees a “PINCHER!” on the stairs and calls for her bug catcher and help catching it.  Once caught she examines it closely and carries it around until it dies. Clara is happy, I am slightly confused, and the earwig dies.

As a side note this was the best two dollar Christmas gift I’ve ever bought: Little Bug Locket

Scenario Five:

Clara sees a “PINCHER!” on the stairs starts crying and refuses to move, the rest of her evil family refuses to go to her aid. Clara cries harder, earwig escapes with life. Clara stops crying and finishes walking down the stairs. Earwig wins.

Scenario Six:

I see earwig crawling on the stairs, without screaming anything I silently smush it. Ivy notices and yells at me for smashing the bug. I wonder what brought about Ivy’s change of heart… again.

Our house – the home of the Earwig Sudden Death Casino.

Winners of Earwig Russian Roulette then meet up in the bathtub to drink drops of water and talk smart about their bravery. That is until they hear Clara’s cry of  “PINCHER!” and discover they accidentally entered Earwig Russian Roulette- Bathtub style.