I Don’t.

You know how you hear stories about women becoming unnaturally upset with their husbands while in labor?

I wasn’t.

He was reading aloud Peter Capstick’s accounts of water buffalo attacks, what’s to be upset about?

It seems more natural to be upset that John got to move and play and go places in the first week or so after Jane was born while I took care of her.

I wasn’t.

The desire to leave the house wasn’t even close to stronger than the desire to take naps with my new baby.

Perhaps a screaming fit could have occurred when faced with poopy diaper #5,689 with two year old helping and husband at company Christmas party.

I didn’t.

He deserved a night off after a few weeks of nonstop caring for all his girls.

When I’m  awake late at night with Jane while John sleeps…

I don’t.

So long as I don’t dwell on how I’ll feel the next day it’s often nice and peaceful up at night with Jane.

But when I’m awake late at night with Jane while John snores

…I seriously consider grabbing his lower lip and pulling it over his head while screaming all sorts of irrational things and blaming him for the entire experience.

I don’t.

But perhaps I see what those women in labor are all about now.

The Loss of Power and Ambition

This morning we lost power just as John was getting ready to go to work. There I was thinking that the older girls are grandparent visiting today, Jane is sleeping and John is leaving, I could do something!  I ran through a list of things I wanted to do in my head, take a shower, give Jane a bath, wash laundry, write a blog, make lunch… and they all required power. Then I thought about the possibility that my desire to do something was perhaps linked to my overly contrary nature and it was just the fact that I couldn’t do any of those things that filled me with ambition. Then I thought that ambition to take a shower probably only counts as ambition when you have a newborn… But I’ve got one of those so ambition it is! Then I dismissed that whole line of thinking as too much soul searching before lunch.

I let John run down the water pressure with a quick shower, used the last of the water to fill Storms water bowl and sat in the kitchen feeling annoyed that I only wanted to do currently impossible things and I was hungry! Deciding that the best thing to do would be to find a bit of food for lunch I took one final survey of the kitchen and saw lots of food. Lots of food that required water or heat or both and settled on a trip to McDonald’s.

I had changed and fed and burped the baby, started a fire, the truck was running the gate was opened and I was just setting Jane into her car seat when the power came back on.

Dilemma:

Do I turn off the truck, close the gate, un-pack Jane and make lunch?

Or do I carry on and find french fries?

It was a dilemma, but not a very hard one.