Dear Brain,
I’m ever so grateful for all you do, however. However. We need to talk. It’s about sleeping- I know, I know. You don’t get enough. Believe me, as your body- I know. But here is the thing Brain, I think if you actually tried at night we’d get much better sleep.
For instance, when it’s too hot. I’ve already done the hard stuff. I’ve woken you up, diagnosed the problem and gotten the synapses firing. So could you please do something useful with those brain waves of yours? Throw off the covers. Open a window. Turn on the air conditioner. Anything! I know you love John, I do too. I’m all about snuggling but sometimes we need to let your emotional attachment relax for a few hours and run to the cooler side of the bed!
And so long as we are on the subject of temperatures, let’s talk about being cold. The blankets. They aren’t that far away. There is an entire chest full of extras just at the foot of the bed. So, smartypants brain, when we lose the blankets, could you please rouse yourself enough to find one!? I know – you feel that finding a blanket in the middle of the night is an insurmountable task. But trust me, trying to sleep huddled under a pillow for warmth is also pretty damn difficult.
My other request, is admittedly, a bit harder. It involves the children. Yes, I know, don’t even start whining about how you deal with them all day, they are still our children all night long. And when they come down at night with their pointy elbows, tickley hair, nonstop talking and excessive body heat we need to remove them. Not just hide on the other side of the bed, because, perhaps you’ve noticed, they follow us there! Brain, I have done the pregnant thing- three times. Ditto on the nursing and the co-sleeping thing. I have shared my body and my bed and now? Now I am done. I am too tired, too hot and I am done sharing. We need them to go back to their room in the middle of the night. Yes, they are cute, and their cheeks are soft and when they do fall asleep they are lovely and angelic. But mostly they talk and giggle and manage to stuff their fine, wispy hair up our nose and steal our pillow. They’ve got to go Brain, they’ve got to go.
And finally, when we get a chance to take a nap, could you please just settle down and let us sleep. Stop composing to do lists, dinner ideas and blog posts in our head, you can do that when we wake up. You are jeopardizing our scant hours of sleep and we need it all Brain. We really need it all!
This has been a great partnership, you and me, body and brain. Just think how much better it could be with a little bit more shut eye – we could do anything!
Here is to a continued fantastic union and a long well rested life!
Love,
Your Body
Behind the Willows 
I love this. I have this conversation with my brain too. Really – it’s almost midnight and here I am wide awake and commenting away and not feeling ready to shut down, but know I should because morning comes. Like clockwork. Every morning.
My youngest just went through a suddenly “need to sleep with me again” phase so I related to the not wanting to share your bed bit. They are super cute – but not when I’m trying to sleep 🙂
Hope you get some good shut eye tonight.
Thanks, you too! But like you I’m up commenting when I should be getting ready for bed… brains… what’cha gonna do?!? 🙂
LOL! Apparently surf the web 🙂 Okay, I’m shutting down. I don’t really want to, but I know I should. My mom would certainly tell me I should. So I’m going with that!
Take that brain!
That’s right! Brain’s got nothin’ on “Mom says…” 😀
It’s so hard to do when it’s finally our alone time. Good for you getting your brain to listen to your body! Mine is much more stubborn 😉
Well, I told it… we’ll see if it listens! 🙂
This is brilliant! And sooo true – if I am awake / almost awake, I whisk them back to bed immediately without any adverse consequences. If I’m groggy already I don’t have the energy, and they sneak in, and then that’s that! Morning comes and EVERYONE is shattered, especially the children, ha ha. Must get the brain to fire up more often 😉
Yes, that is exactly what happens here too. The last time the youngest was sideways in the bed, demanding that I give her my pillow and kicking John in the chest telling him to move over. Yet, getting her all the way back upstairs seemed to difficult at the time… Hopefully my brain will take the hint! 🙂
Oh my I loved this so much! My brain is always in engage mode especially when I need to go to sleep! I think I am going to re read this one more time so that the message finally sinks in!
I hope it helps! John has the ability to say “Goodnight” and then fall asleep 2 seconds later – I can’t turn off the brain near that quick!
Excellent descriptions! I miss the angelic sleepers, but not the bed hogs!! (well, ok, maybe a little bit….)
You can borrow mine at Christmas! 🙂
This is great, Jessie. I eagerly await Brain’s reply to Body. 🙂
Thanks- we’ll have to see if Brain is too affronted to reply or has something to retaliate with…
Could be my husband talking. He eventually got out of bed at 1pm last night to work on some translation work because he couldn’t sleep and if he couldn’t sleep, he may as well be working. Sigh! Let’s hope tonight his brain allows him to sleep, otherwise I’m getting a baseball bat!
I hope for his sake he sleeps well! 🙂
What a brilliant post. Love the idea of the body and the brain having a conversation.
Thank you- I just wish it would work! 🙂
Haha oh that’s great! Oh, sleep…
Now I want to go take a nap. Oh, wait. I only woke up a couple of hours ago. Dang.
I know the feeling- I always want to take a nap! 🙂
My kids, now grown, reported that a popular game when they were little was to stand in my doorway and see how long it took me to leap up in a panic. Answer: not long.
And what has that gotten me? Well, I’ve always found it easier to write in the middle of the night. And while I’m at it, I usually throw in a load of laundry. And maybe start some bread…
Mostly, though I’m waiting for revenge. For the little grands (alas, still no-shows) who I can tell about this really fun game to play at night with Mommy…
😀 Ha, I’m sure their Mommy will love it when they learn that game…
I admit I am sometimes a screamer at night. You know when woken up by a kid standing next to the bed that I didn’t know was there… or my husband walking in (he’s on 2nd shift) if I’ve already fallen asleep. I shall never show your comment to my kids and hope they never think to make a game out of it! 🙂
Kids grow up……their is light at the end of the tunnel 🙂
That’s a relief, then I’ll only have to worry about that hot & cold thing! 🙂