Fiona

In her 13 years with us, Fiona spent most of it exercising the art of camouflage. FionaA tortoiseshell colored cat, she was able to blend into the background, the shadows, and even the blankets with remarkable ease. Shy of new people, visitors often didn’t realize we had a cat. But every night she’d come out to perch (yes, I said perch) on the highest point of John or me in bed. There she would lie, completely unfazed by any amount of wiggling, re-positioning or outright cat eviction. If anything moved her out of her spot she’d just regally reclaim her high point, never deigning to acknowledge us commoners below her.

Here is a prime example of Fiona perching on Piper the Great Dane. This was not a one time occurrence.

Here is a prime example of Fiona perching – on Piper the Great Dane. This was not a one time occurrence.

She stole food off the table, never caught a mouse and put up with a modest amount of harassment from the kids but was generally outperformed by our old Great Dane in almost all cat duties. Except when it came to harassing dogs.Fiona

 

Fiona had perfected the “I’m the queen and you are going to get it if you chase me” saunter. When ever a dog would come to visit our normally shy cat would appear right in the midst of the action, pointedly ignoring everyone- to taunt the dog.  She occasionally got chased, never got hurt and twitched her tail in an extra smug fashion every time a dog got yelled at.

Her dog harassment hit it’s high point just a few months ago when Digby was visiting.

Fiona

 

Digby being a Great Dane, Saint Bernard, Doberman mix, is rather – large, but he had been cowed by our little seven pound cat since he was a puppy. Digby was no longer fun to taunt and so Fiona was ignoring him, off doing her camo thing in another room as I walked across the living room.

Gyspy, the cat, was not.

I accidentally stepped on Gypsy’s tail and Gypsy let out a giant cat scream which had us both hitting the ceiling. Digby leapt off the couch, like only a giant gangely dog can leap, to see what sort of excitement was going on. By the time he crossed the ten feet to meet us, Gypsy was long gone and Fiona had appeared in her place. Fiona, who had come flying in from another room, assessed the situation and decided that the dog was to blame. She attacked him with her de-clawed front paws as Digby cowered in terror. I, helpfully, dissolved into laughter as I tried to “save” Digby and send him outside for his own protection. He willingly ran through the door as Fiona gave parting swats to his butt. Trip, not wanting to be left out sprang into the fun and got a nose full of swatting before I “saved” him as well. Dogs taken care of, Fiona ignored my laughter and stalked back off toward her sleeping spot.

Fiona

Now that she’s gone the dogs may not miss her but the nights sure do feel a little colder without my old kitty perched atop me every night.

Colorado: Not All Fishing

My mom and I took a trip to Colorado and despite the look of the previous post we did see more than fish.

But it’s possible we only looked up when the fish weren’t biting!

Runes by Ednah Walters

I loved it.

It’s young adult. It’s fantasy. It’s a sappy love story. It’s full of bad-ass “people” and it stars a tenacious heroine.

Of course I loved it.

While it could be said that there is nothing super surprising or novel about this story line, Runes is well written with a good back story and solid characters.

Just because I’ve eaten and loved chocolate chip cookies my whole life doesn’t mean I don’t still want more tomorrow.

Would I recommend it? Young Adult fantasy lovers, grab your copy.  Runes is free for downloading on Amazon! Just be careful, like chocolate chip cookies, it’s hard to stop after just one. And, since my cookie and YA fantasy willpower are about the same, I can tell you that book number two, Immortals, is also quite tasty!

A “Rate It” Rant

Rating systems drive me nuts.

I’ve been told they are a necessary evil at the doctor’s office.

But seriously.

How do I even know where to rate my pain on a scale of 1 to 10? I don’t think I’ve ever been at a 10. That seems like that must be pain that makes you pass out in self defense. I’ve never done that.

Well, there was the one time I got a shot of Novocaine up my nose and I passed out, but that was differently terrible, not insanely painfully terrible, though still not something I’d ever recommend. I birthed three children with no drugs. That wasn’t all warm cuddles, but I didn’t pass out or anything.  And while I remember it being painful, it was a different kind of pain than stubbing your toe. Just as when you have the kind of back pain that makes you think your spine will sever if you move the wrong way it’s different from the constant ache of a tooth. Yet somehow you are supposed to pick an arbitrary number on the same sliding scale for all of them?!?

Ridiculous!

Conversely, I’m not always sure I know what no pain feels like. There have been times in my life that I thought I didn’t have any pain.  Then I found out that I did, I just had been living with it so long I didn’t even realize it was there until it was gone.

So, basically if you don’t know what the top of the scale would be like and you aren’t even sure you understand where the bottom lies, and pain comes in so many various forms and my 5 of pain probably isn’t the same as your’s, how are you ever supposed to pick a non-arbitrary number when asked!

What a crazy system!

Fortunately, despite my above list of aliments, I don’t have to go to the doctor and rate my pain very often.  And I get to avoid that rating system all together. Except for Wednesdays.

Perhaps you have noticed, Wednesdays I post book reviews.

Book reviews in which I never give them a rating on a scale because I hate that. Giving a book a rating is almost as bad as rating pain. My internal rating scale is not the same as yours. And how can I rate a young adult fantasy novel and a collection of nonfiction essays on the history of kitchen tools on the same scale? It’s not even close to the same kind of writing!  And the world expects you to rate books on a scale that goes no further than five.

Five.

Seriously.

Let’s look at the top and bottom.

At the bottom we have one. Those must be the worst kind of book. Perhaps a book that you couldn’t even finish would qualify. Of course, then one would wonder why you would review it, I wouldn’t, but at least we have our bottom.

Which means on the opposite end we have fives. To be totally opposite of a book that was so terrible as to be unreadable, it has to be AMAZING. The kind of book that becomes a classic or at very least the kind of book that no matter what kind of reader a person was, no matter what subject matter they gravitated to, even if the book was totally outside their normal genre, you would feel confident putting it in their hands and saying “You’ve got to read this book!”

There aren’t a lot of ones out there (thank you editors of the world) and there aren’t a lot of fives out there. So that leaves way too many books to squash into the remaining three numbers! Because I’d rather not spend my time reviewing books just to tell people what I hate about them I’m not reviewing books that are twos. That leaves me 3 and 4. So 3 ends up being a nice solid story and 4 is a book I really liked. And that is just not enough numbers people! Not enough at all.

The moral of my rant (can rants have morals?) is that if you run across my reviews on Amazon or Goodreads and wonder why they are predominantly fours with a few threes thrown in, that’s why. And if you are an author wondering why I gushed about your book yet gave it four stars, that’s why. And if you are the person with the power to add a lot more stars to the book rating system you have my total support!

The Swing

The Swing

by Robert Louis Stevenson

How do you like to go up in a swing,
   Up in the air so blue?
Oh, I do think it the pleasantest thing
   Ever a child can do!

Ivy on the rope swing

Up in the air and over the wall,
   Till I can see so wide,
Rivers and trees and cattle and all
   Over the countryside—Jane on rope swing

 

Till I look down on the garden green,
   Down on the roof so brown—
Up in the air I go flying again,
   Up in the air and down!

The Slapstyx by Annabelle Franklin

The Slapstyx was written for 8-10 year olds so, of course, I had to read it aloud with all my girls (ages 3, 5 and 8) to see what they would think.

I, as the adult, liked the set up of the book. The ocean is being harmed by super strong, super bad cleaning products and two sisters need to help stop it. That on it’s own could have been a bit much for young girls. BUT if the super cleaner is full of dark magic, the goblins are making the dirt and the dolphin spirits are getting hurt by the overfed plankton monsters. Well, that makes it a lot more approachable and fun!

The three year old, was interested in the mermaid type creatures (dolphinae) and that’s about it. She is three and there’s no pictures, what can you expect?

My five year old snuggled in very close during some of the goblin encounters but was always the first to want to hear what happened next.

The only reason she was the one begging the loudest is because the eight year old kept going to bed with my kindle to read ahead so she already knew what happened next, but she sat at attention to listen every night!

 

Would we recommend it? My eight year old girl says girls in her class would like it because it has mermaids in it and the boys would like it because of the goblins. All the girls agreed that the goblins were a little scary, though never scary enough to stop reading. But by far the best recommendation comes from my five year old. We had two chapters to go when she said, “Mom, can you finish the book tonight and then read it again?” a sentiment that was silently echoed by her older sister who took the book off to bed to re-read after we were done.Rosie's Book Review team 1

This honest review was given in return for a free copy of the book from its author.

My Children Are Bats

My children are bats.

Bats with extraordinarily advanced echolocation systems.

This is the only explanation I have for their unique locating system. Namely that when they yell “MOM!!!” over and over again they walk straight to me, whether I answer their call or not.

This will be helpful if I ever become lost in the wilderness and someone thinks to ask my children to help find me.

Which is a fact I will try to keep in mind next time I’m trying to carve out a solitary five minutes from my day.

"MOM!"

“MOM!”

Note: Please ask my children to help find me if I become hopelessly lost in the wilderness.