It’s true what they say.
As my children age I am getting less intelligent.
Or as my eldest says, “YOU’RE JUST STUPID!”
Sadly that was as I was asking her to do something totally outrageous like get in the car for swim lessons and not after one of our dreaded circular conversations when it might (in a nicer manner of course) have been warranted.
Ivy has two snack times now and, my feelings on that aside, I needed some clarification on exactly how it worked.
“Do you need to bring a snack for milk break too?” I ask.
“No”,she says as she laughs, “They pass one out.”
“Oh, so you only need to bring one snack.”
“No!“, and she laughs harder shaking her head, “There are two snacks!”
“Mom…” she laughs as she shakes her head.
“No really. When do they pass out snacks?”
“MOM! At snack time!” -giggle, giggle-
“But, then when do you eat the snack you bring?”
“At snack time!”
“So you do need to bring two snacks?”
And so the conversations goes round in circles while the first grader laughs at her oh-so-ridiculous-mother that doesn’t know a single thing about snack time.
Clara is more patient with me.
She knows that sometimes I just don’t get it. When that happens she raises her eyebrows, look to the heavens and says, “Actually Mom…”
Every now and then Ivy will pipe up with a gem like this: “How many ten minutes.”
And I, admittedly, panic.
It’s early in the morning. I have no idea what we are talking about. The question makes no sense to me. Is it better to pretend I didn’t hear? Or do I ask for clarification and risk the circular conversation before I’ve finished my cup of tea? Will she find my stupidity this morning amusing, frustrating or will it bring on tears?
“No Mom, mini-corn dogs are a healthy lunch.” Ivy says laughing at my disbelief.
And then Jane chimes in.
What, who me?!
Then, just like that, in the midst of the chaos I can practically feel it happen -poof- there goes another batch of brain cells.
Fortunately I’ve done .45 seconds worth of internet research on sub-par sites and discovered that dark chocolate is good for your brain.
Unfortunately we are out.
Somebody forgot to get more…